Letting go of baggage.

Dear Diary,

I know it is not time to be reflecting on the year that is 2007, but I feel that it is necessary for me to understand what happened, let it all out, and then let it go.

In the beginning of the year, I was assigned to an important task. I was proud that people thought I was capable of achieving such, and it felt good to be part of the 'team'. Fast forward a little bit, it was time for me to do what I was assigned to do. I was not happy with the way I was 'instructed' to do my task. I was not happy with how I was given multiple different instructions on how to do my task. I was not happy at how some people seem to be biased in their judgement of people and their performances. Sometimes it felt as if all that I do is in vain.

At one point I didn't understand why I even agreed to do the stuff. There are just too much stress involved, and bear in mind that this is done over my own sweet 'unpaid' time. Of course, I knew from the very beginning that it is purely voluntary, but please do understand that not everybody is as committed to the cause that you are fighting for. Some people have different priorities, like their family, their hobbies, their job. And the thing is, I don't even mind doing the extras. I love going the extra mile.

But what killed me the most was the way you dealt with me. I'm sorry, I am not aware of how you deal with the other people, so I shall reserve my comments on that. Please do know that if you ask me to do something, you do not turn around and ask someone else to do it, especially when you haven't even told me to stop. I have spent a lot of time doing the stuff that you want to ask other people to do.

It is also very pathetic to see the superficial way you deal with people, when you feel that they may be of use to you. It is really sad, because I fell for it. I, the stupid fool, fell for it.

You do not appreciate what you have. You do not appreciate people. You do not appreciate the things that people have done for you. You simply discard them, when they are no longer useful to you.

But law of karma says what goes around comes around. I will not hope it on you, I am not that cold. After all, we were once friends.


I wish you luck. And with this, I let go of this baggage.